Crazy Talk

I'm going to go out on a limb here, but hang with me. 

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I've lived by myself for the last 4 years.  During this time of solitude I sometimes end up... talking to myself. Let me be clear.  I don't mean just talking out loud.  Everyone does that.  I mean having a conversation with myself.  Por ejemplo ("for example" in espanol... spanish)

ME:.  "How was your day?"

ME:.  "Okay.  My boss was really on my ass today!"

ME.  "Oh word?  Why don't you tell me about it?

I've never talked to anyone about this so I just might be a weirdo. Yet, I think there's something to a little crazy talk.  Over the last couple of months, I've been having delightful conversations with myself, as usual, and through those conversations I've had "Aha moments" and uncovered reasons behind some of my behaviors, new insight into problems, and new ways of looking at situations.  It was like "I" stopped talking and I was speaking from someplace much deeper in my mind.  It's a little New Agey so I'll clarify. 

Think of it like FreeWriting.  Free writing is an exercise that writers do to prevent themselves (read Ego) from interfering with their work.  So they'll sit and start writing for a specified amount of time, non-stop.  During that time they write anything that comes to mind.  If their mind wanders then they write that.  After the allotted time has passed they can read their writing and highlight important phrases or pieces.

The same thing happens with talking to yourself.  As you converse with yourself about whatever you were initially talking about, the mind starts to wander and, just like a conversation with another person, you find yourself talking about all types of things.  Sometimes during this process, I find that I tend to start talking about things that are bothering me, ideas that I stored away to develop later, or new ideas that interest me.  Just a couple of weeks ago, I had an epiphany about why I was SO bad (and I mean dismal) at returning calls, texts, emails.  One moment I'm chatting with myself, the next I'm shocked at what I just said.  

If you have the opportunity, ask yourself a question about something that's been bothering you and chat it up.  An uninterrupted flow of self-conversation.  You might like where you end up!

Ok, I get it.  This is weird, but I wouldn't share it if it didn't help me.  I mean seriously, what's the worst that can happen?  

Back on Track

I feel I can speak for most people and say that we like doing new things.  Feel like your hips don't lie?  Sign up for dancing lessons.  Want to get your body into shape? Buy a gym membership.  Want to express yourself through the majesty of song?  Guitar lessons it is.  We. Can. DO IT!!

Everything is well and good.  For a couple of months, your new activity is so new and exciting that you practice everyday!  Watch YouTube videos.  You go above and beyond the call of duty, because you're on an adventure!  Hooray!....

But in time, you miss a couple of practices, start YouTubing Fail videos, and eventually you give up entirely.  

Yeah, it even happens to me.

I dream of these great things I want to learn and rarely get past the novice stage.  My recent failed project is learning to play guitar.  I bought this electric guitar from the pawn shop (chipped and everything), replaced the strings, purchased books, signed up for lessons... the whole shabang (sp).  But I haven't touched that sexy beast in weeks. I suck at life.  How will I ever play spanish guitar in Spain at this rate? (yeah, I want to do that!)

Turns out, the problem isn't that we suck at life (for most of us), but rather that we don't understand how to build the habit.  Most of us assume that we can live off of the idea of achieving the goal.  We imagine that the passion is strong enough to carry us through when sleep is more appealing than practice, when ordering a pizza is more appealing than that salad, when video games are more appealing than studying.  It's really a relationship between you and that dream.  What happens when the puppy love runs out and all you have is is a dusty, chipped guitar? 

I think I may have an answer!  What if I told you that a Stanford social psychologist studies this phenomenon?  What if I told you, that he developed a method of creating habits that stick?  What if I told you, he offers this service for free?  I'm currently setting myself up to get back on track with my guitar!  Here I come Spain!

What if I told you you can find him here, at TinyHabits?  

Ready to get back on track?